Is It a Pivot or Is It a Change of Plans? A Better Way to Handle Parenting Stress

Hey, What’s Up! It’s Tommy.

We are wrapping up February, which feels crazy to even say. Winter always feels endless after Christmas, but here we are, staring down spring. And I want to talk about two things today that have been heavy on my heart.

First, what we can start preparing for as spring comes. Second, the difference between a full change of plans and simply making a pivot.

If you’re new here, welcome. I’m a dad to an almost 11-year-old non-speaking autistic son. We are not trying to “fix” our child. We are trying to help him live as full and as well as possible. That is the heart behind everything I share.

As the weather starts to shift, I want to challenge you to think about your backyard differently. For us, the backyard became part of Wyatt’s safe space. When all four of us feel overstimulated, stressed, or boxed in, 30 to 40 minutes outside can completely change the tone of our evening.

Fresh air, movement, and simple outdoor input regulate his nervous system in ways that nothing inside the house can.

We built a large sandbox years ago. It has been one of the most impactful and affordable additions we’ve ever made. Wyatt can be extremely stimulated, and after 15 minutes barefoot in the sand, he is calmer. His entire demeanor shifts. There is something powerful about grounding, about being connected to the earth. I have personally experienced relief from chronic foot pain after sleeping on grounding sheets. I have talked to others who saw inflammation drop. I am not prescribing anything, but I am encouraging you to explore.

Spring is coming. Think about how you can make your backyard usable. A fence. Trees. A sandbox. Something simple. Outside time has been a game-changer for us as an autism family.

The second part of this episode is about mindset.

Recently, I had to adjust major plans due to the passing of our fire chief. He served 67 years in our department. A mentor. A steady leader. A man who said, “I’m going to wear out, not rust out.”

I had a speaking engagement at a national convention scheduled. Old me would have treated this as an all-or-nothing decision. Either miss the funeral or miss the convention. That mindset creates anxiety and guilt.

Instead, I pivoted.

I adjusted flights. I stayed for the ceremony. I still honored my professional commitment. That shift in thinking saved me from spiraling into stress.

As parents, especially special needs parents, we deal with decision fatigue constantly. Doctor appointments. Travel. Meltdowns. Illness. School issues. We second-guess everything.

Here is what I am learning.

It is often not a total change of plans. It is a pivot.

We do not have time for “should have.” We do not have time for guilt stacking up in our hearts. We make the best decision we can with the clarity we have.

And clarity comes from taking care of yourself.

One of the most powerful tools I have added this year is simple: writing things down. The power of the pen is real. When stress stays in your head, it feels massive. When you put it on paper, it becomes manageable. You can break it down. You can breathe.

If your mind races at night, write it down. If you feel overwhelmed, write it down. If you are facing a big decision, list your options. It brings peace.

I am also working on launching a coaching program focused on mental health, resilience, and stability for parents and business owners. I have spent the last year rebuilding myself so I can show up better for my family and for you. I truly believe you have to have joy to spread joy.

You only die once. You live every day.

Let’s stop letting every pivot feel like a catastrophe.

Spring is coming. There is green on the horizon. There is growth ahead. And there is more life to live.

Key Takeaways

• Getting outside can dramatically reduce stress and overstimulation in autistic children and parents.
• Creating a safe backyard space can improve regulation and daily family life.
• Grounding and sensory input from sand and nature may have calming physical effects.
• Decision fatigue is real in parenting, especially for special-needs families.
• Shifting from an all-or-nothing mindset to a pivot mindset reduces anxiety.
• Writing things down helps organize stress and improve mental clarity.
• You must invest in your own mental health to serve your family well.

If this episode encouraged you, please share it with another parent who might be feeling overwhelmed. Leave a review. Send it to a friend. Help us grow this community of families walking similar roads.

Visit us at https://spectrumincamouflage.com

Email me directly at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com

We are in this together.

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Together, we can create a community to support autistic kids and their families.If you have questions or ideas or want to share your journey, email me at tommy@spectrumincamouflage.com.

Let’s learn, grow, and make a difference, one step, one piece of the puzzle, one child at a time.